HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

     I should write something today.  Something profound.  Something transcendental.  Deep and esoteric.  Or humorous and down-to-earth.

     I should write something here today.  For my readers and my friends.  For whoever happens to stumble upon this blog.  For posterity perhaps?

    I should write a few lines.  Several sentences?  A paragraph?  Or perhaps a treatise.  Or just a few words.

    I should write about life and its meaning.  About the inexorable passage of time.  The joys and sorrows of all these years on earth.

     All I have are questions:

What does it mean to be this old?
How did I get here?  
Why am I?  

I suppose Descartes would tell me: "you think; therefore, you are."  Ok, but - what next?

I am; I have been; I will be, for a while at least.  I hope.  

I confess: if I could, I would like to start over.  Avoid all the mistakes.  Enjoy all the pleasures.  Learn everything and teach everyone.  So many wrong choices.  So many wasted moments.  Why don't we get a second chance?  I suppose many people believe they do.  I wish I could believe it too.

Nevertheless, all in all I've had a good life so far.  Some disappointments.  Some losses.  A few achievements.  Plenty of joys.  But mostly a smooth journey, sometimes even dull.  But - dull is good.  It's better than chaotic.

So - I did write a few words, neither profound nor humorous.  Just plain.  From the heart.  And that's all I can manage today.