Wednesday, April 4, 2018

NaPoWriMo Day 4

It's been a long time. Forty some years
since I landed on this land. It was cold
then too, like today, even though then
it was February. A newcomer with all
the newcomer's fears and anxieties,
insecurities, what am I doing here?
Why have I left my home for this?
How will people receive me?
Will they appreciate my wit,
my intellect? Will they accept me?

It's been a long time. Forty some years
since that time and I'm still afraid.
Whenever I walk into a new situation,
with new people,
my stomach knots, my heart beats
just a little fast, armpits moisten.
Will they appreciate my mind,
my humor? Will they focus
on my looks, my voice, my accent?

My accent - that red light of foreignness.
A clear marker of difference. The tiny voice
with sharp vowels and misplaced prepositions
flashing STRANGER STRANGER.

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