Friday, September 14, 2012

TIFF IT'S STILL HERE...

...but I am not in the mood for movies and stars.  My best friend for 40 years is suddenly gone; I don't know what to think, what to feel, what to say.  I cannot cry, cannot talk.  I am numb from incredulity. 

Sooner or later it will all sink in and the reality will slap me in the face.  I think I will write about her at some point; I will write something, or maybe more than one thing. 

Right now I have no words.  No words.

Yesterday we saw "Barbara" - a German film, and "White Elephant" - Argentine movie.  I liked them both.  Today I decided to see the first film we had - "Kon Tiki" - about Thor Heyerdahl: an excellent feature film about Heyerdahl's trek to Polynesia from Peru.  It was entertaining and for brief moments made me forget the ugly reality of our loss.  Couldn't go to a film this afternoon.  Instead we had supper with our friends and talked about Sonia.  Two more films tomorrow and Sunday we head back home.

I feel like I should be home doing something, helping her parents, making phone calls.  Something.  Anything to keep me distracted.

Words, words, just words.  That's all I have.  And they are not enough. 

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